Wedding Planning Cornwall: How to navigate your guest list for your Covid 19 wedding.

Due to the Covid-19 pandemic, couples are now looking at downsizing their wedding day. Here’s 10 useful tips on how to manage this dilemma with the correct etiquette...

In pre-pandemic times, wedding season would be well underway. Covid 19 wedding couples who were scheduled to get married this summer are making difficult choices with gathering restrictions, social distancing guidelines and discouraged travel, couples are now left with the task of having to face new normals with events for the foreseeable future. Do they postpone their weddings entirely? Get married with just immediate family there and have a larger party at a later date, when it is safe to do so? Or have the wedding they planned but cut down the guest list?

Any normal circumstances, it would not be the done thing to un-invite a wedding guest after they’ve already received a save-the-date or official invitation. But unfortunately, we’re not dealing with normal circumstances at the moment. Today, I’m sharing my advice on how to downsize your guest list with etiquette.

1. Call the professionals.

If you have a wedding planner we will deal with all of this for you, if not speak to your suppliers as they have become professionals in dealing with rescheduling and limited guest capacity. Remember you are not alone so get some advice before you make those all-important decisions.

2. Talk to family and friends

Some family and friends may live overseas or from different parts of the country with various restrictions. Have an open conversation and get their opinions as by giving them the option to not attend your wedding may relieve a little bit of strain if they are unable to attend in the first place. 

3. Be honest but compassionate

Depending on the situation at the time you this will help guide you on the number of guests able to attend. If a venue has a certain capacity this will be a great way to make your guests understand you have no other choice. Remember they have been looking forward to sharing this special day with you so tread carefully when you share the news as they will be disappointed and may not fully understand your choice to un-invite them.

4. Keep it fair 

Now for some, compromising the guest list may be working in your favour due to the financial strain that the Pandemic has put you in, however, it’s really important not to make guests no longer invited feel as if you are happy with this outcome! It’s essential that no couple use the pandemic as a rationale for knocking merely a few select names from a list. If it helps set a rule that can work across the board. For example, immediate family only, no children, no work colleagues etc. Setting a rule will show your guests that you have made your decision fairly.

5. Let guests know as soon as Possible

This news is not going to be the best a guest has received, although a little expected. Let them know as soon as you can so they can deal with their own plans accordingly. 

6. Set new expectations with yourself and your guests.

Coming to terms with the loss of what you had originally envisioned for your wedding: whether it be the original date you had planned towards or the sheer capacity of your guest list. Talk it through with your partner and mourn this together, then set expectations about your wedding postponement and the guest list between yourselves. 

7. Share your new plans with them.

Now a new date has been set, get excited again! Try not to think about what could have been look to the future and what your new date and wedding will bring. Share your new plans with your new guest list so they can be involved and get excited with you.

8. Involve guests that can not attend

For those guests that are unable to attend think of ways they could still be involved. Maybe ask them to write a message that can be read out during the speeches, or set up a video call during the ceremony so they can see you get married.

9. Be Thoughtful About How You Share your day

Since it's a special day for you, the couple, your original guest list will want to celebrate regardless. A thoughtful way to approach this step is by sharing images from your wedding day first with all your guests before distributing them further across social media accounts. That way, even though you've had to scale back on your guest list, those chosen recipients will still feel as if they were part of your day. You may decide to ask your guests not to post images throughout the day onto social media so those guests not present will be sat at home looking at what they have missed out on.

Trevenna Barns in St Neot

10. Enjoy it!

After all the emotion, heartbreak and rescheduling remember to enjoy this day! You have planned so hard for it and come through a huge pandemic so be proud that your day has finally arrived and you finally get to marry the love of your life!

Photography by Amy Sampson Photographer at Trevenna Barns in St Neot Cornwall.

I hope this has helped some of you to manage a difficult situation. The wedding industry is here for each and every one of you and wish you all the best in rescheduling your plans and hope you have the most amazing day in whatever way you decide. If you need a little more guidance on Covid 19 weddings or wedding planing in general please do not hesitate to get in touch I would love to help!